Well, I'm not dead, but...

Brendon Urie got a buzz-cut.
Brendon Urie got a buzz-cut.
Brendon Urie got a buzz-cut.
Brendon Urie got a buzz-cut.

BRENDON URIE GOT A BUZZ-CUT.

The only things to make me feel better would be:
A) A cheeseburger (plain except for Long Island Sauce) from In-N-Out
B) A pint of Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream--Phish Food, please!
C) Superman asking me out, even if the most he does is smile at me for strangely long periods of time.

Yeah.